By the time my relationship with Dad was gone, I had a full time job and a part time job. I registered for Senior year of High School. I had my own apartment and shit was going pretty good. I was surviving, and what more could you ask from a seventeen year old entering his Senior year of High School. A dude got hired at my part time job. His name was Greag Bedner. We kind of hit it off since we both loved busting balls. He was six years older than me, but we got along great. And through him, and my own future experiences, I would come as close as a kid could come to sexual molestation, without ever being touched.
We hung out all the time. Due to weird family things going on with my own siblings, and the fact that Mom had passed, his Mom and Sister became like a surrogate family. His Mom became, simply, Ma Bedner. We spent the next five years forming a bond, I never had before. I had heard his sister Dana bring up their Dad James before, but never cared enough to ask. I just figured he was a jag off like my old man. One day we were drinking at my pad, and I decided to inquire. My life would be changed forever.
"What happened to your Dad Greag?" We chatted back and forth for awhile but something didn't seem right. All of the sudden, he came clean. He told me in detail about what his Father did to him. He told me how he had swallowed his Father's sperm because it was a magic potion. Masturbation. Anal sex. As it turns out, this Motherfucker did things to my best friend that I had never heard of. But my friend never forgot. Since the day I met him, he was always into the harder drugs, and I didn't understand why. Opium and Cocaine. That was his escape. I always thought it was retarded. Looking back on it, who am I, or any of you to judge. I thought my Father was a prick. This dude's Dad did things to him that I never heard of.
He was my best friend. my BEST FRIEND. He was my best man at my first wedding. He was Keira's God Father. The only time I ever saw him cry, was when I asked him to be her God Father. You would have thought that his own daughter had been born. Greag died on October 31st 2004. Heart failure due to a drug overdose. I will never forget the phone call I got from Ma. As I lay my head back on my couch cushion with tears pouring. I can't help but think there had to have been more I could do. Ma didn't know the extent of what happened. What if she did? Greag forced me to not say a thing. He was deathly afraid it would kill Ma. But in the end, it killed him. Which in turn, created a shell of who Ma used to be. This was the first time I had ever been introduced to pedophilia. It killed my friend, and I can't help but think that I could have saved him.
The truth is, due to Greag and Keira's birth, I finally started realizing how devastating molestation was to a child. I tried to be there for him but I could never help him overcome his demons. I will always regret that..