Thursday, June 5, 2014

06-15-04..1:37 P.M..........(Her Life- Part III)

 I received the call shortly after break (9:00). I left work quickly in order to meet the Mother at the hospital. I had participated in Le Mas with the Mom and at this point was looking forward to the birth of my first child. Everything seemed to go smoothly except for the Mother's interference. But, She was a piece of shit and to this day still is. Everything was pushed to the side though. Come 1:37 on the afternoon of June 15th she was born. The most beautiful creature I had ever seen. I remember holding her shortly after her birth. She had big blue eyes, just like her Father. The feel of her little hand in mine. The look in her eyes as she gazed upon me. She was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, and I helped create her. I helped bring her here. Nothing can fully describe that feeling when your FIRST in born.

 Never before had I experienced true love. Sure, I thought I had. I was married before. I was involved in serious relationships. But I never experienced true love before. When I was a little younger I always questioned, "How do you know when you really love some one?" It was probably just an excuse for a few failed relationships, including a marriage. But the moment I looked in my Daughter's eyes, I instantly knew what true, unconditional love was.

 I spent two days at the hospital with Renee (the mother). At this point I could care less about her. She was never more than the Mother of my child. But I still had respect for her and supported her. After all, she was the Mother of my child. I remember when she went home with Keira. I had spoken with Megan by the time everyone went home. To this day I remember helping Renee into the car after strapping Keira in. Renee's Mom was taking them home back to her house. And I went out with Megan to celebrate the birth of my child. How fucked up was that? But back in '04, and to this day, I saw nothing wrong with this. Renee knew where I stood. I never lied. And I was slowly falling for Megan. In fact, Keira being born made it easier to realize that I was falling in love with Megan. And it definitely made it easier to know that I never had those feelings for Renee.

 Even after the moment arrived that Keira arrived at her Grandmother's (where Renee was living) house, I was still there. I would go over there at night so that Renee could sleep. I would sleep in Keira's room next to her. When Keira got up crying, I would get up to change her, feed her, or just plain comfort her.

 One night I was sleeping next to Keira in her room. I heard the door open but didn't move. Suddenly, I felt someone rubbing my crotch. It was Renee, and she was asking if we could have sex. I told her NO. She asked, "Why not?". I explained to her that not only was I not interested in a sexual relationship with her anymore, but I was also dating another woman, and it was serious. I turned over in the guest bed as to ignore her. Out of nowhere I received a slap to my face. I jumped up asking, "What the fuck?". Renee chased me out of her house screaming at me. As I got into my car, I vividly remember her telling me that, "YOU WILL NEVER SEE THIS KID AGAIN!!!!!!!!".

 I just left her house in an attempt to let cooler heads prevail. I had no idea how much worse things would get..................